So I’ve lost the renewed script for my adhd meds
If that’s not ironic I can’t tell you what is
The younger of the two kids I babysit has just started potty training
So ofc right as I’m leaving he pees on the floor and I step
i have never seen a nipple in my entire life.
step one: lift up shirt
2) look dwon
holy shit.. holy Fucking shit what the fuck is that
groot is probs assumed to be male but tbh i figure groot is a lil genderless being. who needs the gender binary when you’re a celestial tree creature. riddle me that.
"Are you a boy, or a girl?"
"I am Groot."
when girls press their whole body against you when they hug, it means they like you a lot. also, they’re measuring your body to determine how long it will take them to eat your flesh, a technique shared by boa constrictors
You would think that teenagers would be the rudest customers when really it’s mostly old, middle-aged people.
The elderly are either adorable or the wrinkly reincarnation of Satan there is no in between
women are considered fragile but I’ve never seen anything as easily wounded as a man’s ego
this post is stupid as hell
case in point
someday i hope my ocs can be someones fave character. that’d b cool
people who dry swallow pills go hard as hell and should not be fucked withi used to dry swallow pills until a searing pain developed in my throat and chest and with the help of the world wide web i found out it burned a hole in my fucking throat please take your pills with water kiddies it’s worth it
HOLY SHIT OKAY
Seriously has anybody considered lesbian dragons it’s like two of the best things ever what could be better